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n relationships “splitting” or black and white, all or nothing thinking is what causes us to toss the baby out with the bathwater. We may not recognize that bad behavior doesn’t make the person himself bad. Everybody engages in behavior they might not be proud of. People do things or say things when they are upset or dis-regulated that they wish they hadn’t done.
Understanding codependency is the first part of recognizing if you have co-dependent traits or if codependency is an issue in your relationship. Codependency has been a buzz word for decades. It is a term used in the twelve step recovery programs to describe the co-addict, or person who takes care of the addict. But Codependency […]
Just as narcissistic personality disorder is an epidemic among men, so is borderline personality disorder in Women. Where those diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder are roughly 80% men, the opposite is true for borderline personality disorder, which tends to show up more in women. I am working with so many clients who have either borderline wives or mothers. Sometimes both. Most people involved with a borderline woman find her to be near impossible to deal with.
Many of the people I work with who are coming out of toxic relationships, with narcissistic partners, are often more interested in learning why they keep attracting these types of relationships than anything else. If you are interested in having a healthy relationship, changing your toxic relationship patterns is really where you need to focus […]
We live in a world of programs. Our society is steeped in various programs that tell us who we should be. Our families all have their programs, mostly passed down from both sides of the ancestral lineage. Schools have their programs. We have programs in our peer groups. But all those programs we grow up with tell us who we should be rather than ask the all-important question “who are you?”
Most dysfunctional family systems cast at least one of the family members into the role of the scapegoat. The scapegoats are usually the most sensitive ones. When people blame you, you may find that you are a scapegoat.
As we do our inner work, our shadow work, we look at all those things within us that are not loving. We look at our fear, which is the opposite of love. We look at our hatred, which is a resistance to love. We look at our envy, our jealousy, our resentments, and our deep pain. All of these keep us from embodying the higher vibrations of love.
In this episode of Pandoras Box, Kaleah talks with former Counseling Client Marie Claire who struggled with a pattern of getting involved with narcissistic men. She is now in a happy marriage that Marie considers to be the result of her hard work in overcoming these patterns.
In this interview Kaleah and Marie talk about the challenges of breaking addictions to narcissistic men, embracing self-love and finding “the One.”
For some of us, out greatest challenges begin early in life as we struggle with how to live in the world. Teenage suicide is at a record high with the increase in bullying, cyber bullying, and the expectations to fit into a societal “norm.” Anorexia Nervosa, a disease that effects a lot of young women is a type of slow suicide where one wastes away to skin and bones. If not treated it will result in death by starvation or complications of the disease. As a teenager I suffered from Anorexia which resulted in a near death experience, where I was given a choice. I would like to talk about my slow suicide and why I chose to live.
Most people coming out of a Narcissistically Abusive situation are suffering from Trauma. They have PTSD of the complex variety. One of the symptoms of PTSD is the spinning of stories. Telling one’s story over and over again can initially help with processing the trauma. But there comes a point where it actually has the reverse effect. It keeps one stuck in the trauma. Healing your Narcissistic Abuse Story is an important part of recovery.